If you won the lottery would you tell anyone?
Nope, just the three or four hundred girls that I allowed to live on my private island.
Were you a good student?
I was good at missing lectures to get high and record songs, but I ended up with a 2:1 in Fine Art so I can’t have been that bad.
Where do you think you’ll be in 5 years?
In a government run human meat camp with everybody else.
If you had to choose to be in a reality TV show, which would it be?
That one where you have to shit in a lunchbox and show it to that woman so she can grade you on it. It’s like Crufts, but for shit.
What sitcom character reminds you of you?
I am basically a slightly more rock n roll version of Chandler Bing. Sad, but true.
Strangest gig you’ve ever played?
We played this free party on top of a mountain in the valleys. No one had brought any lights, so by the time we went on at about half two in the morning, it was pitch dark. I couldn’t see my guitar or the rest of the band and the only way I knew there was an audience was because I could see the glowing orange tips of their cigarettes.
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
No, he’d be called Derrick.
Do you collect anything? (toys/mags/tickets etc)
The still beating hearts of those who oppose me.
What did you want to be when you were a kid?
Believe in karma?
Nope, nor do I believe in chameleons.